Dizzy.

Today - the day of my superheadache, I chose to spin the kids in circles. I dont' know why that made sense.

Update for continuity ... or for when I appear on the show Medical Mystery on Discovery Health Channel

Babysitting right now

I was really excited today b/c I've had the same weight for 3 DR visists now - in a row - two of them a month apart, and the other two just a few days apart. That's so cool, in my mind. Really excited to find that out - and totally cool with my weight now. I even thought - well I don't really want to gain weight - but five lbs wouldn't be impossible - and I don't really want to lose weight - though five lbs wouldn't be horrible.... it's just so comfortable. Thanks be to God... that's an answer to prayer... He has really just walked with my lately and it's making everything sweet. Even the trials, which have not stopped... maybe they've even increased but with a different outlook - it's okay.

Well - the swollen eye has not returned - that was absurd. Did I tell you abotu that? I was writing online and all the sudden I kept having to fuss at my eye b/c I thought something was in my eye lash. No. Turns out - it was my eyelid. It had swollen and was pressing down on my eye... it literally looked like a giganto blister. Absurd to me... no clue... just kind of prayed and got on with it and it hasn't been around since.

I've developed the most sensitive skin I've ever seen - if I scratch my face a blemish starts to appear. It's odd.

And then yesteryday I had a sore throat - but today i'ts gone and I have a really maddening headache.

It's all so beyond me.

So I'm going to go to the ENT's office just b/c all of this is so difficult :p I've been in a lot of pain. Which is okay but I can't work well with the different ailments. The kids just demand so much. :p This morning I took two hours off so once again, my sick hour bank is empty.

Well.

Like I said - I just each and every day aim to continue to give myself to God. And I literally mean I say "God - here. I'm yours. Yolu made me. You love me. I serve you. You want righteousness for me. And I trust you." and that's it. I just have to trust Him. Job said though he slay me, yet I trust Him. Slay. Death - and yet it's okay, Job says. I just have to say that about everything. I have to say "ailment - but it's okay, I trust" or "fatness - it's okay, I trust" or "ugly this or that - okay, I trust" and "how will I pay for this? okay - I trust"

Not that I have incredible faith or these things aren't physically an demotionally painful - they are, but I also pray for more faith.

Okay more you , less me.